On my 48th year
Updated: Oct 28
In some ways, i feel like I'm just beginning.
You know, like a baby except with some mileage and a few more wrinkles.
Maybe it should be "48 is not too late?" 😉
47 has felt like a great shedding.
As I reflect back, I learned this year about betting on myself, having discernment on the right friendships, learning to rest, how to trip balls 🍄 , quit my job, got stronger and build confidence, and finding my truth in solitude and nature.
I got to celebrate my 48th birthday yesterday.
After I dropped the kids off at school, I went right to the Decatur Cemetery, laced up my hiking shoes, and found the secret creek and trail and just...wandered.
I had this as my soundtrack (beware, it will grip you instantly).
I really wanted to set some intentions for the new year and give thanks.
I've always loved cemeteries. They are full of stories. Sorrow, joy, love, connection, endings, beauty, family, sadness.
And Decatur Cemetery has a section where they have a walkway filled with what appears to be hand-made wind chimes. I just love it.
But most of all, as I look around and ask - if I died tomorrow, would I have done enough? And the answer is always no.
Who knew death could be so motivating?
I hopped in my car and went to Deepdene Park, my other favorite little trail nearby.
Something about getting lost in the woods brings me so much joy.
And by lost, I mean, it's a tiny little patch. My city-girl a*s is always lost and on guard - ya know, but taking my time to reconnect.
Once again, I felt completely whole and supported. I was remembering my own source of power. And it's always there.
I think I've unlocked something that could make all the difference for you, too.
Would you be interested in joining me?
I've had some major developments over the past few weeks - and especially this past week.
I recorded a solo update this week as I'm excited and nervous and scared and...well, all of it.
I'm mostly scared because my next phase really does involve you.
What if you don't care? Or don't get it? Or think it's dumb? Or just aren't interested?
I've had big ideas before and fallen flat on my face.
But I'm betting on a different outcome.
And I know if you join me, it'll be the right fit for us both.
INVITATION: What scares you this week? Let this be a sign to nudge you forward.
I'm learning that if the curiosity for what could be is greater than the fear of failure, you can't lose. Much better to try and see what happens than wonder 'what if?."
Well, be sure to listen to today's episode. It's a big one!
P.S. Want to help me choose a new name for the podcast? I'm giving out $50 if I choose your title! Submit your ideas here. (it helps to listen to this week's episode for context)
P.P.S. If you're being manipulated by a narcissist (or know someone who is), this ep blew my mind. I mean, "inconsistent empathy" is a great descriptor! Highly recommend listening.
P.P.P.S. Seriously, this playlist will knock you right on your ass. You will be instantly transported and will be held. Trust me. And big thanks to my girl, Rachael Hoffman for putting it together. Love you, girl.
P.P.P.P.S. F- Ye. That is all.