Some days, my 8-year old son would come home so agitated.
Whenever he gets punchy with us, I know what happened.
He was excluded at school.
Through the years, I noticed that when Danny would have a normal spill or fall down or run into something, he would be wretching in pain...I mean, as if he was being tortured.
My daughter on the other hand, would fall on her face with her skin hanging off and not even notice.
But Danny? He could sense things before others could.
He could tune in to others emotions.
He's always had really special friendships since he was in pre-school.
His friends were always his anchor.
And when the balance of his friendships was tipped, Danny was completely destabilized.
I panicked that maybe Danny had sensory issues or anxiety or early signs of depression.
Turns out, Danny is a Highly Sensitive Person (yep, that's a thing!).
But then i realized something I couldn't shake.
I recognized the same exact reactions in myself.
I just built very strong muscles to over-compensate for my own sensitivity.
I mean, I am hurt ALL the time.
Don't text back right away?
Don't include me in an invitation?
Don't take me up on my offers to hang?
My left brain knows it's irrational and not to take it personally.
But my right brain really does take it personally. And I've inadvertently built moats to keep people from getting too close.
The Kid Factory's Cindy Robinson says "our kids come into this world and trigger all the things we need to heal." Read that again.
So, Danny and I are working through it with each other and through each other.
Another cool benefit of having your own sociology experiments living in your home.
Think you might be more sensitive than you'd like to admit?
Apparently 15-20% of the population are Highly Sensitive People and many are deeply empathic.
But not a lot of people know it's even a trait that exists.
I wanted to introduce you to HSP mentor, Alissa Boyer.
Turns out being highly sensitive is a total superpower.
We talk a lot about people pleasing, hyper sensitive vs highly sensitive, creativity, setting boundaries, and so much more!
P.S. The feedback from the past 5 episodes from the Belonging miniseries on Culture Changers is helping me restore my faith in humanity...that it's resonating and helping. THANK YOU!
P.P.S. Fun fact: I totally get freaked out when people say "love you" to me. Unless it's my immediate family, I almost never say it back. Do I have a problem?
P.P.P.S. I've been doing a 30-day gratitude challenge through one of my very favorite people on earth. Highly recommend you join this group.
P.P.P.P.S. Who do you know that you suspect might be highly sensitive? Won't you forward this to them? It could really help! Sure did for me.